HOFBRAU MUNCHEN!

They're selling pumpkin pies everywhere! Autumn must be around the corner! I see Halloween costumes in my periphery. Yep, commercially, it's fall. And as I return to Bergen Community College this fall, I am faced with the ever so pressing but all the while very unimportant problem of how and what to feel at this point of my quarter-life. I've boiled it down to two pop-culture references. Should I expect to feel like an idiot (though lovable, ask Veronica Vaughn) and play out Billy Madison's return to school? Or should I just replay scenes from Community over and over in my head, half-expecting one of the characters to show up as I walk through BCC's dreary halls?

Solid choices, right?

Anyhow, I mentioned earlier that fall is around the corner. Now, if you don't believe in pumpkin pies and Halloween costumes in stores as indication of fall's impending arrival, then perhaps you should believe in Oktoberfest beers arriving in your local liquor stores as a sign. Earlier this week, I picked this beauty up from Costco...

Isn't it beautiful?

Hofbrau Okotberfest. If you've been reading this blog (God bless you, kind soul), you will remember me mentioning Oktoberfest, a little bit of its history and importance, and the wonderful beers brewed for this occasion. This is one of them. (duh!) These beers can only be brewed in Munich to be considered as Oktoberfest beer. It also has to abide by the Bavarian Beer Purity Law. Brewed by Hofbrauhaus Munchen (also Hofbrau Munchen), this particular Oktoberfest beer is a mainstay in said occasion. Founded by the Duke of Bavaria, Wilhelm V, in 1589 to serve as the brewery to the Royal Residences. The beer they brewed became so popular that an invading monarch once asked for some hostages and 600,000 barrels of Hofbrauhaus beer in exchange for not ransacking the city of Munich and ensuring its safety. Now, who said beer can't solve anything? Enough history.

The Hofbrau Oktoberfest has to be one of my favorite mass-produced beer of all time. Ok, so slight exaggeration. But it is up there. I get all excited when I see the yellow box in Costco and not see Corona printed on it. When the 5 liter mini-keg variety pops up, I snatch 2 or 3 of them for good measure. It pours a clear, crisp, golden hue that is instantaneously inviting as you look at your glass. Unlike some of the beers I've already talked about, there is no cloudiness in this one. It's pretty transparent as beers go. As you take a sip, it'll give you a slight creamy taste, while the hops and barley come up afterwards. It's not very bitter, nor is it heavy like some American variations of "Oktoberfest" beers.  This beer is meant for mass consumption. It's not meant to make you full or have you overdose on bitterness. In fact, as I'm writing this, I've enjoyed four bottles of this golden nectar and I feel fantastic. It will make you want more. It'll make you want to be in Munich, in the Hofbrauhaus tent, and sing songs German songs that sound angry and happy at the same time. It'll make you want to kiss the beautiful and busty German beer-server-girl as she brings you more steins (mugs) of Hofbrau Oktobeferst (wait, I want to do that regardless of how many beers I've had). As far as I'm concerned (my opinion, as you know, does not matter much) enjoying this wonderful brew is as close to being in Munich during Oktoberfest. But then again, I've never been. Who wants to come with?

Mhmmm...beer

Flat Tires and Elephants

You're looking at the title and you're thinking..."what?"

Let me explain.

Me+My Subaru+Newark, NJ=Disaster.

Let me explain further. 

I was in Newark, NJ for something sort of a party. Flo and Efrin had us over for a get-together with awesome food and some select Puerto Rican rum. I had noticed earlier that Flo had had nothing to drink except for water. Didn't think anything of it. Then, she proposed a toast. Then she said she was pregnant. We were elated. Well, most of us were, there were two who were utterly shocked. Then toasts followed. Then the party slowly ended and we all bid our adieus. I get into my car, start it, drive it for about two minutes, then realize that I have a flat tire. In Newark, NJ. At about 11:30pm. In Newark. Crap crap crap. Crap. So I change the flat tire, sweating through my shirt, thinking of how much it would cost me to get a new tire. And hoping that I get out of there without incident. I'm a big guy but a dark Newark street is not on the top of my list of favorite spots. I found myself swearing never to come to Newark again. Then I realized I had be at my Aunts house in the morning. The house is in Newark. Ugh. So, I get home, I open the fridge and I see some salvation for the night...

ELEPHANTS!

Now, if you're gonna ask me why I chose Carlsberg Elephant, you're gonna be disappointed. I was on my way home from work late one night and realized that I had nothing in the fridge. And by nothing I mean, I had no beer. Being that all liquor stores in the area are closed after a certain time, I had to pass by a bar and pick up a six pack. Only certain bars carry "packaged goods". By that they mean they sell beer "to go". I walk into this one called the Tilted Kilt and picked up the first thing I see other than Coors, Miller, and Budweiser. Just so happened to be this guy.

I have had Carlsberg beer before, a serviceable pale lager. However, I have not tasted this particular variety. I didn't quite know what to expect. Before I get into the the beer, lets talk about the brewery. The Carlsberg Group is a Danish brewing company founded in 1847. As it turns out, this brewing company is the 4th largest in the world. They hold several brands all over Europe and even has a 40% market share in Russia. That last bit might not be too impressive to you given that Russians love their Vodka. Think about it this way,  the Russian Beer market grew to $20 Billion in 2010. Bored yet? Ok, fine. Here:

The Elephant is what the "experts" call Imperial Pilsner. Now, I'm not really sure what that means. Does it have an empire? Is it going to take over the world? Who knows? What I do know is this: when a beer is prefixed by the word "imperial", it tends to be a stronger variation of the original. Like an Imperial Pale Ale (or IPA) is much stronger than a regular Pale Ale. So I check the beer's ABV (alcohol by volume). The 7.2% on the label confirms my theory. Its a pretty strong beer. Color does not indicate how strong a beer is and neither does its smell. In fact, I really couldn't smell much from the glass. That's why I was pleasantly shocked when I took a sip and was greeted with a very malty beginning and a sweet finish. However, the sweet finish does remind me a little bit of barleywine and that threw me off a little. Now, if you look this beer up, you'll find that  most people who rate beers will give this something between 4 and 6 out of 10. I feel as if 4 is harsh. Its a serviceable beer, like its parent variety. It wont be something I'll look for but still feel like I came out a winner  when I left the Tilted Kilt with something other than Coors, Miller, or Budweiser. 

And, dude, for goodness' sake! ELEPHANT! Its got an ELEPHANT on the bottle. AN ELEPHANT!

In the words of the most interesting man alive, stay thirsty my friends.